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Laura adds salt to Bayou Boeuf; officials say water is safe

Staff Report
The St. Mary Parish Water and Sewer Commission No. 1 water treatment plant is experiencing above-average levels of chlorides or salt in Bayou Boeuf, the treatment plant’s water source, but the salt concentrations don’t pose any bacteriological issues.
However, water plant Operations Manager Brian Tabor said those on a salt-restricted diet may want to factor in these elevated salt levels when planning their daily sodium consumption.
Tabor said the water at the plant, which services the Amelia and Siracusaville areas, meets all primary drinking water standards as mandated in the Safe Drinking Water Act.
The elevated salt levels are due to strong south winds caused by Hurricane Laura, and Tabor said he expects salinity levels to return to normal levels in a few days. Customers will be notified through media when they reach those levels.
Anyone with questions or concerns should call the water and sewer commission’s office at 985-631-2907.

MARGARET MONCEAUX COMEAUX SNODGRASS

June 28, 1937 — September 1, 2020
Mary Monceaux Comeaux Snodgrass, 83, a resident of Morgan City, passed away Tuesday, September 1, 2020, at Franklin Foundation Hospital.
Mary was born June 28, 1937, in Abbeville, the daughter of Alex Monceaux and Ella Gaspard Monceaux.
Mary served St. Mary Parish as a bus driver for 26 years. She loved her family dearly and enjoyed spending time with her grandchildren and great-grandchildren. Mary loved humming birds, reading and cooking. If the T.V. was on, you could catch Mary watching a Christmas movie, no matter the time of the year; Hallmark was also Mary’s favorite.
She will be sadly missed and lovingly remembered by her son, Byron Comeaux and wife Rhonda of Bayou Vista; two daughters, Pamela “Pam” Arnette of Morgan City, and Chantel Fontenot and husband Chad of Bayou Vista; stepson, Donald “Don” Snodgrass Jr.; stepdaughter, Jana Wesley; one sister, Linda Abshire of Rayne, Louisiana; nine grandchildren, Jennifer, Jamey, Brandon, Kenneth, Jonathan, Ricky, Chasity, Caitlyn and Carissa; five step-grandchildren, Jake, Don III, Whitney, Brandy and Scarlet; and 19 great-grandchildren.
Mary was preceded in death by her first husband, Luther Ray Comeaux; second husband, Donald Snodgrass Sr.; son, Ricky Comeaux; and brother-in-law, Tony Abshire.
Due to restrictions with limited gatherings, current guidelines allow for 100 people in attendance for the visitation and service at the funeral home. Masks are required upon entering the funeral home.
Funeral services will be held at 3 p.m. Thursday, September 3, 2020, at Twin City Funeral Home with Deacon Randell Jennings officiating. Visitation will be held from 10 a.m. until the time of services. After services Mary will be laid to rest in St. Joseph Cemetery Mausoleum.

FRANK DEUEL CHAPMAN III

July 28, 1985 — August 26, 2020
Frank Deuel Chapman III, affectionately known as Trey, passed away in the morning hours of Wednesday, August 26, 2020, following a courageous, hard-fought eight-month battle with a very rare cancer. Trey carried this cross with his head held high and a strong will to win the battle, never showing his pain or complaining, and with a positive attitude to the end. He was 35.
Born shortly after midnight on July 28, 1985, in Morgan City where he was raised, Trey was the second of two children born to Frank and Leona Chapman, who had moved to Morgan City from Oklahoma prior to his birth. Born in Cajun country, Trey fell right in with the South Louisiana way of life. He had a passion for the outdoors, enjoyed fishing, and absolutely loved duck hunting. A genuinely good-natured person who was loved by all who knew him, Trey could always be found with a smile on his face, a smile that could light up the room. Trey’s smile got even brighter when he met the love of his life, Lacy Comeaux. He and Lacy were blessed with a son, Liam, and have resided in Centerville for the past five years. Liam was definitely Trey’s world. If he wasn’t working, you could bet he was spending time with his family, especially Liam. Not many can say that their job was a passion to them but Trey certainly did. For the past five years he was employed with Berard Transportation as a Heavy Haul Leader Man, a job that he deeply loved. His co-workers truly were his family away from home. He will be missed beyond measure and will be fondly remembered by all who were fortunate to have known him.
Those he leaves to cherish his memory include his fiancée, Lacy M. Comeaux; their son, Liam Alexander Chapman; his parents, Frank Deuel Chapman II and Leona Burgess Chapman; his sister, Rachel Chapman and her children AnaClaire Purdy and Seth Purdy; his paternal grandparents, Dr. Frank Deuel Chapman and Gloria Mahan Chapman; his parents-in-law, Wayne Comeaux and Elaine Daigle Comeaux; his brother-in-law, Seth Comeaux and his wife Chelsea and their child Lexie; his sister-in-law, Erin Bolin and her husband Chance and their child Parker; his grandparents-in-law, John “Red” Comeaux and Patsy Adams Comeaux; as well as numerous aunts, uncles, cousins and friends.
He was preceded in death by his maternal grandparents, Ralph Dale Davis and Margaret Oyler Davis; his cousin, Mindy Ellen Mattox; and his grandparents-in-law, Larry Daigle and Elizabeth “Beth” Blanco Daigle.
Funeral services were held Tuesday, September 1, 2020, at Ibert’s Mortuary in Franklin during an 11 a.m. memorial service, with Deacon David Simoneaux of Immanuel Baptist Church in Morgan City officiating. A gathering was held with family and friends from 8 a.m. until service time. Inurnment will be held at a later date in the Centerville Presbyterian Cemetery.
In lieu of flowers, the family asks that donations be made to help alleviate medical expenses. A special account has been set up at Hancock Whitney Bank in Franklin.
Family and friends may view the obituary online by visiting www.iberts.com and are encouraged to share their condolences, cherished memories, love and support for the family.
Arrangements were entrusted to Ibert’s Mortuary, Inc., 1007 Main Street, Franklin, LA 70538, (337) 828-5426.

Trump Boat Parade set for Saturday

A Trump Boat Parade will be held Saturday in Lake Palourde in Morgan City from 10 a.m. to noon.
Those interested in participating will meet at the judge’s stand, and the boats will circle the lake along La. 70 until noon.
All boats, including house boats, are wel-comed.
For more information, email trump2020parade@gmail.com.

Morgan City police radio logs for Aug. 31-Sept. 1

The following are the radio dispatch logs from the Morgan City Police Department. To report unlawful or suspicious activity, call the police department at 985-380-4605.
Monday, Aug. 31
5:43 a.m. Federal and Railroad avenues; Complaint.
6:46 a.m. 800 block of Marshall Street; Medical.
6:54 a.m. 7200 block of La. 182; Medical.
7 a.m. 1400 block of Federal Avenue; Medical.
7:02 a.m. 1900 block of Cedar Street; Complaint.
8:20 a.m. 600 block of First Street; Lost and found.
9:25 a.m. 600 block of General McArthur Street; Telephone harassment.
9:49 a.m. 700 block of Myrtle Street; Civil.
9:49 a.m. 700 block of Myrtle Street; Theft.
9:52 a.m. 500 block of Brashear Avenue; Disturbance.
10:34 a.m. 300 block of Grizzaffi Street; Complaint.
10:36 a.m. 1000 block of Eighth Street; Theft.
10:51 a.m. 200 block of Canary Street; Medical.
10:53 a.m. 300 block of Second Street; Medical.
11:17 a.m. 1300 block of Federal Avenue; Alarm.
11:31 a.m. La. 70; Crash.
11:58 a.m. 400 block of Aucoin Street; Animal complaint.
12:18 p.m. 800 block of Levee Road; Complaint.
12:41 p.m. 600 block of Terrebonne Street; Animal complaint.
12:54 p.m. La. 182 West; Assistance.
1:21 p.m. 1000 block of Fourth Street; Lost and found.
1:27 p.m. 500 block of Bowman Street; Theft.
1:57 p.m. 7300 block of La. 182; 911 hang up.
2:07 p.m. 300 block of Louisa Street; Telephone harassment.
2:08 p.m. 600 block of Fig Street; Complaint.
2:36 p.m. 200 block of Bowman Street; Medical.
3:17 p.m. 500 block of Hilda Street; Suspicious subject.
3:22 p.m. Veterans Boulevard; Welfare concern.
4:12 p.m. Duke Street; Complaint.
4:36 p.m. 700 block of Myrtle Street; Arrest.
4:42 p.m. 1500 block of North First Street; Complaint.
4:58 p.m. 700 block of Myrtle Street; Stand by.
5:05 p.m. 7200 block of La. 182; Removal of subject.
5:08 p.m. 600 block of Maine Street; Medical.
5:14 p.m. 8400 block of La. 182; Alarm.
5:20 p.m. Fifth Street and Brashear Avenue; Arrest.
5:56 p.m. Berwick; Arrest.
6:10 p.m. 7200 block of La. 182; Removal of subject.
6:27 p.m. 600 block of Martin Luther King Boulevard; Theft.
6:29 p.m. 1200 block of Spruce Street; Loud music.
6:43 p.m. 7100 block of La. 182; Complaint.
7:07 p.m. Railroad Avenue and Fourth Street; Arrest.
7:19 p.m. 1200 block of Brashear Avenue; Alarm.
8:12 p.m. 7200 block of La. 182; Disturbance.
8:13 p.m. Federal Avenue and Arenz Street; Arrest.
8:28 p.m. 1000 block of Brashear Avenue; Alarm.
9:48 p.m. 1200 block of Spruce Street; Medical.
Tuesday, Sept. 1
12:42 a.m. Marquis Manor; Suspicious person.
4:26 a.m. Ochsner St. Mary; 911 hang up.

Police: Bicycle ride ends in arrest

A man riding a gasoline-power bicycle pedaled his way into an arrest, said Morgan City Police Chief James F. Blair.
—Myron Hatch, 47, Terrebonne Street, Morgan City, was arrested at 5:27 p.m. Monday on charges of resisting and officer with false information and traffic laws apply to a person riding a bicycle, plus a warrant for three counts of failure to appear.
Narcotic detectives with the Morgan City Police Department observed Hatch riding a gas-powered bicycle weaving in and out of traffic. Investigators were aware of active warrants for his arrest through the 16th District Court.
Investigators conducted a traffic stop. Hatch attempted to conceal his identity and gave investigators a false name. He was placed under arrest and transported to the Morgan City Police Department for booking and incarceration.
Blair also reported these arrests:
—Vintrell Boyd, 38, Bourbon Street, Thibodeaux, was arrested at 5:02 p.m. Monday on warrants for two counts of domestic battery.
Boyd was located at the Patterson Police Department and placed under arrest on active warrants held by the Morgan City Police Department. He was transferred to the Morgan City Police Department for booking and incarceration.
—Daniel Ray McNeal, 42, Halsey Street, Morgan City, was arrested at 6:15 p.m. Monday on a charge of remaining after forbidden and a warrant for remaining after forbidden.
Officers were called to an La. 182 address about McNeal being at the address and was previously barred from the property. They located McNeal on the property. A warrant check revealed the Morgan City Police Department held an active warrant for his arrest. He was placed under arrest and transported to the Morgan City Police Department for booking and incarceration.
—Morris R. Barley, 56, Carrol Drive, Morgan City, was arrested at 6:22 p.m. Monday on charges of turning movements and required signals and possession of crack cocaine.
Narcotic detectives with the Morgan City Police Department observed a traffic violation in the area of Federal Avenue and Brashear Avenue. A traffic stop was conducted, and the driver was identified as Barley.
During the traffic stop, Morgan City Police Department K-9 Dally was deployed around the exterior of the vehicle. K-9 Dally gave an odor response to the presence of illegal narcotics. Investigators located suspect crack cocaine during the search of the vehicle. Barley was placed under arrest and transported to the Morgan City Police Department for booking and incarceration.
—Harpreet Singh, 40, Victor II, Boulevard, Morgan City, was arrested at 8:23 p.m. Monday on a charge of simple battery.
Officers were called to an address on La. 182 for a disturbance. They learned Singh had committed a battery on another individual at the same address. He was placed under arrest and transported to the Morgan City Police Department for booking and incarceration.
—Ronald Joseph Davis, 57, Clements, Morgan City, was arrested at 8:26 p.m. Monday on a charge of turning movements and signals required, driving under suspension and possession of crack cocaine.
Narcotic detectives with the Morgan City Police Department observed a traffic violation in the area Railroad Avenue and Federal Avenue. A traffic stop was conducted, and the driver was identified as Davis.
A computer check revealed his driver’s license was under suspension. During the traffic stop, Morgan City Police Department K-9 Dally was deployed around the exterior of the vehicle. K-9 Dally gave an odor response to the presence of illegal narcotics. Investigators located suspect crack cocaine during the search of the vehicle.
He was placed under arrest and transported to the Morgan City Police Department for booking and incarceration.
St. Mary Parish Sheriff Blaise reported this arrest:
—Jared Paul Duplechin, 43, Saturn Road, Bayou Vista, was arrested at 9:21 a.m. Monday on a charge of theft.
Duplechin was released on a summons to appear on November 2, 2020.
Assumption Parish Sheriff Leland Falcon reported this arrest:
—Alex W. Washington, 30, of La. 1, Labadieville, was arrested Sunday on a charge of aggravated assault.
On Aug. 21, deputies responded to the call for service in which the complainant advised that Washington had threatened to shoot him. The threat was in connection with a domestic matter.
Based on the information presented, deputies applied for and were granted an arrest warrant for Washington. The accused had already departed the scene. The warrant was placed into the national data base.
On Sunday, Washington was arrested in Terrebonne Parish.
Washington was transported to Assumption Parish on Monday and booked into the Assumption Parish Detention Center pending a bond hearing.

Jeremy Alford: What if no one gets Louisiana's electoral votes?

In between hurricanes over the past week or so, and in the wake of the national conventions for the Democratic and Republican parties, you may have given some thought to Louisiana’s eight electoral votes. Will President Donald Trump be the beneficiary or will it be former Vice President Joe Biden?
You could probably offer an educated guess for that question based on polling and our most recent presidential races. But what if neither candidate received our electoral votes? What would happen?
The campaigns of both men would certainly lawyer up and put boots on the ground in Louisiana. National media outlets would shine their collective spotlight on this state and red and blue hats alike would definitely want to know why.
You may think this is a pointless topic of conversation. Yet you may also be surprised to learn that there were actually two election cycles from Louisiana’s colorful past where no one received Louisiana’s electoral votes.
In 1864, Louisiana left the Union during the Civil War and the state didn’t participate in the presidential election. Ten other states offered up zero electoral votes as well. In the end, Abraham Lincoln was still re-elected by a very healthy margin.
Then there’s the time federal election counters simply didn’t trust us. That was in 1872, when Louisiana’s electoral votes were rejected by the federal government due to irregularities. Technically, the state supported incumbent President Ulysses S. Grant, who went on to win re-election. Elections of all stripes were messing for Louisiana in 1872, when two candidates for governor claimed victory and political rallies turned violent.
No one that I personally know or know of believes this will happen again in the fall when Trump and Biden face off. But there is a sense of trepidation by some about the big 2020 ballot, that we’re headed toward some kind of watershed moment that future historians will point back to better explain the politics of tomorrow.
That anything-can-happen feeling is largely being fueled by the fact that we don’t yet know how the Nov. 3 general presidential election is going to work in Louisiana. Secretary of State Kyle Ardoin, the Legislature and Gov. John Bel Edwards agreed to change a few rules following the COVID-19 outbreak. The compromise plan that emerged ahead of our July and August elections allowed for enhanced vote-by-mail opportunities and an extended early voting period.
Since then, however, Ardoin and the Legislature’s election committees have supported a scaled-back plan that would essentially force many in quarantine due to the coronavirus to vote in person at their respective precincts. The plan also requires approval by the governor and the entire Legislature, with senators and representatives voting by electronic ballot
Edwards, however, has already sent a letter to Ardoin rejecting his plan, which is enough to sink the proposal as introduced. So, unlike what we saw in the mid- to late-1800s, Louisiana will definitely be awarding all eight of its electoral votes this fall, but we don’t know yet how voters will be allowed to deliver them.
The stalemate likewise means that the 2020 guidelines will ultimately be decided in a courtroom drama. In a somewhat pointed move, the federal judge overseeing a challenge to the state election plan has scheduled the opening hearing for the same day lawmakers must turn in their ballots for the proposal.
A hearing for the plaintiffs has been set for Tuesday, Sept. 8, said Peter Robins-Brown, the communications director for the Power Coalition for Equity and Justice, which brought the lawsuit along with the NAACP and others. That’s also the deadline for legislative ballots.
Judge Shelly Dick scheduled a hearing for the defendants, including Ardoin, to commence the following day, on Wednesday, Sept. 9. The judge’s decision is expected sometime shortly thereafter.
Dick made the announcement during a status hearing last week, just as Hurricane Laura was approaching our western coastline. The election-related news has been understandably overshadowed by the hurricane, which prompted a visit from the president over the weekend.
The Trump campaign is probably just as confident in receiving a win in Louisiana as it is that Ardoin’s plan is the appropriate course to take. But the reality of COVID-19 and the importance of our democracy should far outweigh the politics of our Electoral College system — especially when there are only 60 or so days separating us from Election Day.
For more Louisiana political news, visit www.LaPolitics.com
or follow Alford on Twitter @LaPoliticsNow.

St. Mary dodges worst of Laura

Franklin Mayor Eugene Foulcard described the city’s condition following Laura’s lashing as, “good,” thanking God for the storm having pushed further west than originally forecast, saving Franklin otherwise potentially significant inflicted damage.
“We had a couple of instances of localized flooding at Eastwood Drive, and out at Hazelwood,” Foulcard stated, “with a little water along the Blakesley Subdivision. Thank God nobody got water in their apartments or homes, as far as went reported to City Hall.”
He conjectured that once the new flood gates are installed, within the next two or three months, along the Charenton Canal past the Baldwin Bridge, “Franklin will be sealed off totally,” furthering that with such a flood mitigation structure in place already, Franklin would have seen zero flooding at Eastwood, and in the Blakesley and Hazelwood subdivisions.
“Other than that,” he said, “we held out extremely well. We didn’t have any tree damage, and really didn’t have to clear out anything from the streets. So, we made out really well and we are very thankful. The Franklin Fire Chief, (Chuck Bourgeois) did a marvelous job of protecting everything south of the railroad tracks. Pecan Acres was adequately protected, as well as Willow Street was adequately protected by the flood gates. The flood gates and levee system south of Franklin really did its part. They (Franklin Fire Department) shored-up the levee system with a little dam near the Gulf Craft and Metal Shark area to stop that flow of water from coming off the Charenton Canal.
“Hats off to all the City personnel: Chief Beverly and the police department, Chief Bourgeois and the fire department, Jeremy Smith with the public works department, and Bernard Daniels with the utilities department.
“Those guys did an extremely good job of safeguarding and protecting the city and all its citizens.”
Foulcard concluded by saying that he would be remiss if he didn’t mention the administrative personnel and city council members at the command station who manned the station night and day during the storm, adding, “They were all in the gap making sure we had everything we needed. It was a team effort. We are all a machine with everyone providing structure and support, as a steady hand at the till.”
Baldwin Mayor Abel “Phil” Prejean’s report for Baldwin’s post-Laura situation was much the same as Foulcard’s.
“One small section of town lost power, but it was brought back by 1 p.m. the next day,” Prejean reported. “None of the roads were blocked. We were prepared and had everything ready to go.
“The Choupique, where the new gates are, once you close the gates, it makes a bowl where some rainwater collected, but we had pumps going for that. None of the water got in any houses, only yards.
“The flood gates worked well. Otherwise, the water would have flooded that area.
“I thought we did very well.”
St. Mary Parish Sheriff Hanagriff said “everything worked and went according to plan. Of course our initial concern was Marco, and that turned to nothing. We just got very, very lucky. I can’t stress that enough.”
Persisting issues were high water. “This storm followed a path similar to (Hurricane Ike in 2008). It didn’t get to Rita level…we’re also very fortunate that there wasn’t a lot of rain associated with it. There was a lot of flooding with Ike, the big key factor here which w saved everybody from Ike especially with that structure not being in place in Bayou Teche yet, was that we didn’t get a tremendous amount of rain, and the bar pit (near the Ver-dunville landing) took on a lot of water.”
“The flow of lilies in the Teche…nobody could understand what was going on, why wasn’t the water going to Ike levels. That was the reason. The bar pits were low and all that water was still in the bar pits.”
The storm surge was a major concern. “The winds and the rains weren’t that big an issue, it was the surge that we were worried about.”
He concluded that the Bayou Teche structure will be in place soon, and design designs are ongoing to place levees around Metal Shark Boats.
St. Mary Parish Office of Emergency Preparedness Director David Naquin said late last week that the parish was still accessing areas.
So far, though, the parish appears to have escaped serious harm, and levees and flood structures as well as preventative measures all worked as they should.
Concerns after Laura passed were cars making wakes on street. “You think you can drive through a neighborhood,” Naquin said, “but the wake of your car will put more water in a guy’s house, and that’s just not right.”
He said areas such as Eastwood Subdivision in Franklin were battling water, while a portion of Burns Point was blocked-off.
Most of Laura’s impact was on the parish’s west end.
Naquin said he had not had any reports of water in homes or businesses, but he does expect some damage in the Cypremort Point areas, where storm surge was about what it produced in Ike.
“It didn’t get quite as high as Rita, but it was higher than they thought it would be,” he said.
Naquin also said homes in Louisa, off Kelly Canal and in the Vacherie, Ashton, Glencoe and Four Corners areas that all have had water before, they probably will have water again.
St. Mary Parish Levee District Executive Director Tim Matte said Thursday he received reports of water rising on areas west of the Charenton Canal that are not protected by levees.
He also reported there was some water in another area south of La. 317 in the Gordy Levees area in parts where there no levee, but he said that wasn’t unexpected and has happened before.
Flood protection measures along the Charenton Canal on Industry Road also worked as planned.
“Although it did get some leaking, that wasn’t unexpected. What we were trying to do is block off a major flow there, and we were successful,” Matte said, adding the water appears as if it is starting to recede.
Laura brought St. Mary Parish maximum sustained winds be-tween 35 and 45 mph, with some gusts higher.
While there were 3,000 power outages, Naquin said about 50% had been restored by 2 p.m. Thursday by crews who had less than a full day to work.
Further east, the Atchafalaya River was estimated to rise to 7 feet, but it peaked at 6.44 feet, Naquin said.
“It’s not flowing out yet, but it’s pretty close,” he said. “We monitor a few things on the river that indicate to us it’s not going to get any higher, and it’s going to be going out before long.”

Hospitals announce area births

Born to Mr. and Mrs. Steven Viet Vu (nee: Alyssa Hewett) of Berwick, a boy, Max Logan Viet Vu, on Aug. 17 at Ochsner St. Mary in Morgan City. He weighed 7 pounds, 15 ounces and measured 19.75 inches.
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Born to Mr. and Mrs. Juan C. Hernandez (nee: Charisma Glynn) of Morgan City, a boy, Matteo Lucas Hernandez, on Aug. 17 at Thibodaux Regional Medical Center. He weighed 7 pounds, 9 ounces and measured 20 inches.
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Born to Mr. and Mrs. Charlie R. Solar Jr. of Morgan City, a girl, Avery Lynn Solar, on Aug. 17 at Thibodaux Regional Medical Center. She weighed 7 pounds, 1 ounce and measured 19.5 inches.
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Born to Chalinda N. Fusilier of Berwick, a girl, Ty’lynn Jer’manie Fusilier, on Aug. 17 at Thibodaux Regional Medical Center. She weighed 6 pounds, 11 ounces and measured 19¼ inches.
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Born to Katherine D. Maher and Blake A. Giroir of Berwick, a girl, Adalynn Elise Giroir, on Aug. 17 at Thibodaux Regional Medical Center. She weighed 7 pounds, 4 ounces and measured 19 inches.
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Born to Regina Lawanda Anderson and Demetrius Roy King Green of Patterson, a boy, Kingston Demetrius Roy Green, on Aug. 18 at Thibodaux Regional Medical Center. He weighed 7 pounds, 5 ounces and measured 20 inches.
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Born to Mr. and Mrs. Manuel A. Javier (nee: Fatima Santos Perez) of Morgan City, a girl, Rosly Javier, on Aug. 18 at Thibodaux Regional Medical Center. She weighed 7 pounds, 2 ounces and measured 19 inches.
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Born to Mr. and Mrs. Jared I. Gilbert (nee: Indira C. Boutte) of Patterson, a girl, Callie Jude Gilbert, on Aug. 19 at Thibodaux Regional Medical Center. She weighed 6 pounds, 11 ounces and measured 18 inches.
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Born to Mr. and Mrs. Javis M. McKarry (nee: Aristine P. Sanders) of Patterson, a boy, Javis Marshall McKarry Jr., on Aug. 20 at Thibodaux Regional Medical Center. He weighed 6 pounds, 14 ounces and measured 19 inches.

Toddler uses foul language she learned from dad

DEAR ABBY: Although he has never hit me, my husband has been emotionally and verbally abusive ever since our wedding five years ago. One of his favorite names for me when he’s angry is “F——n’ B——.” I know this is my fault because I have tolerated it.
Today, my 2½-year-old daughter (who is usually a good girl) threw a tantrum and called me the same name twice. I try to discipline her, but she doesn’t understand that she’s saying something bad if Daddy can call me that. How can she? He blames me for her talking that way, saying he hasn’t called me that in a month. (He called me that last week. I don’t use that language.)
I have suggested marriage counseling in the past, but he refused. I can’t leave him because I am seven months pregnant with our second child.
How do I get both of them to respect me?
DISRESPECTED IN THE EAST

DEAR DISRESPECTED: You know that appointment you wanted to make for you and your husband with a licensed marriage and family therapist? Make one for yourself, right now, because what’s going on isn’t healthy for you or your little girl.
Your husband demeans you because from the moment you married him you have allowed it. Your 2-year-old isn’t being disrespectful when she calls you what her father does. Children her age want attention, and they are mimics. Giving them attention when they use bad language reinforces them to do it more.
Please do as I’m suggesting before you conceive a third child. From your description of your relationship with your husband, his verbal abuse and the disrespect it conveys WILL be an example for your children that will follow them into adulthood.

DEAR ABBY: I am a 37-year-old mother of two (ages 9 and 11). My husband and I have built a beautiful life together. We live in close proximity to his family, whom I absolutely love.
My question involves my own family. My father passed away 2½ years ago. We were very close, so it is an ongoing struggle for me. My mother has since disowned me and my children. She’s a textbook narcissist who has said many very hurtful things and has a new man and new life. Our relationship was always strained, and I knew it wouldn’t be the same without Dad because he was the glue.
I have come to terms with this for myself, but we haven’t talked to our children about it. How do I explain to them that their grandma doesn’t want to be a part of their life? They love her and ask about her often, so I keep making stuff up.
She won’t answer phone calls from me or my husband. I believe she has us blocked. She has also blocked us on social media along with other family members.
I want my kids to know the truth, but I don’t want to hurt them. How can I do this?
MOTHERLESS IN OHIO

DEAR MOTHERLESS: Stick as close to the truth as you can, with some editing. If your children ask about their grandmother, explain that people deal with the death of a loved one in different ways. In your mother’s case, “She needed to look forward and not look back. Because your father’s death was so painful, she is concentrating on things other than family, and although we might miss her, we should be comforted that she has found a way to cope.
It may not be what we would have wished, but it is her way, and we have to respect it and go on with our own lives.”
***
For everything you need to know about wedding planning, order “How to Have a Lovely Wedding.” Send your name and mailing address, plus check or money order for $8 to: Dear Abby, Wedding Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447.

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Franklin Banner-Tribune
P.O. Box 566, Franklin, LA 70538
Phone: 337-828-3706
Fax: 337-828-2874

Morgan City Review
1014 Front Street, Morgan City, LA 70380
Phone: 985-384-8370
Fax: 985-384-4255