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Dear Abby: Young adult struggles with role as caregiver

DEAR ABBY: I’m 23 years old and caring for my two grandparents. My dad, their only son, lives with them, but avoids them at all costs, no matter how much I beg him to help. He causes more problems than he solves. I graduated from college last year, but because of all the doctor appointments, nurse visits and the attention they need, there’s no way I can work. My life is completely absorbed in caring for them.
I’m going crazy! They don’t want to leave their home and won’t pay me or anyone else to care for them, but they need round-the-clock care. I’m not asking for help with THEM, I’m asking for help with balance. How can I be a young adult and full-time caregiver?
IN DIFFICULT CIRCUMSTANCES

DEAR I.D.C.: You can’t. The longer you allow this to continue, the more trapped you will become. Contact senior services and inform them about what’s going on with your dad and your grandparents. Then find a job. I am sure there are many available openings right now. You may have to continue living with your grandparents for a while, but as soon as you can manage it, you should live independently.
As to your father, tell him that if he doesn’t accept at least some of the responsibility for his parents’ care, you will report him to adult protective services for neglect. It may not make you popular, but if you don’t assume control of your future, you will become increasingly isolated.

DEAR ABBY: I have a strong, healthy bond with my 5- and 8-year-old daughters. When the older one was 6, my wife taught her not to let me see her naked when using the bathroom and bathing. That broke my heart. I’m OK with it now, but my wife is now discouraging them from sitting on my lap. I’m a loving and responsible dad, and I would never do any harm to my kids, or do the things my wife thinks I will do. What should I do?
NOT TRUSTED IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR NOT TRUSTED: What you should do is discuss with her the reasons for her fears about the safety of your daughters. The answer may be that when she was small, she was molested by a male relative she trusted. There is nothing wrong with 5-year-old and 8-year-old girls sitting on their father’s lap. What is troubling is your wife’s reaction to it.

DEAR ABBY: My husband of six months (whom I do not live with) refuses to agree not to contact his ex-girlfriends. He refuses to send me copies of emails or texts from them, and won’t agree to allow me to send a polite, but firm, email requesting they stop contacting him, even though his therapist said it was OK to send. What should I do?
DISTRUSTFUL IN NEW YORK
DEAR DISTRUSTFUL: The person you married clearly isn’t ready for the responsibilities of being a husband. Ask him if he’s willing to meet with a licensed marriage and family therapist. If he is unwilling, talk to a lawyer about an annulment. If you do, you may save yourself years of frustration and heartache.

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How to help young athletes deal with defeat

The value of athletic competition for children who like to play sports is undeniable. Though not all children will want to play sports, those who enjoy competing in organized athletics can benefit in myriad ways.
Doctors with the American Academy of Pediatrics Council on Sports Medicine and Fitness note that interest in sports should start with the child, not the parent. Such an approach can ensure children are playing sports because they want to, and not solely because their parents want them to.
The council notes that when children are playing sports because they want to, they can take the lessons learned from competition and use them throughout the rest of their lives. For example, Dr. Steven Cuff, MD, FAAP, who co-authored the 2019 report “Organized Sports for Children, Preadolescents and Adolescents,” says that “the camaraderie and teamwork needed on a playing field offers lasting lessons on personal responsibility, sportsmanship, goal-setting and emotional control.”
When competing, some young athletes may have a hard time handling defeat. In fact, even professional athletes routinely acknowledge how much they struggle after a loss. But there are ways parents and coaches can help young athletes cope with defeat.
—Reward effort. The College of Education at Michigan State University recommends coaches and parents put an emphasis on effort and allow athletes to bring up the outcome of a particular competition on their own. Encourage maximum effort during competition and spend time after the game discussing with athletes how they performed and the effort they gave.
Remind them that their best effort is all anyone can ask for, which shifts focus from a loss to the effort they gave.
—Communicate privately if effort is lacking. Parents and coaches who feel their child or player did not give maximum effort can communicate those feelings privately without putting the athlete down.
Emphasize that the next game is a great chance to show improvement and give maximum effort.
—Encourage a healthy perspective. The College of Education at Michigan State University also urges parents and coaches to encourage young athletes to keep a healthy perspective on their participation in sports. Encourage children not to sacrifice other aspects of their life, such as academics and their social life, to improve their athletic performance.
When young athletes focus too heavily on a sport, that can create an unhealthy situation that makes it that much harder to cope with defeat in a positive way.
—Emphasize the individual, not the athlete. Coaches can speak with their players about their lives outside of the sport. Such conversations can show athletes that there’s more to life than just sports and that they’re more than just athletes, which can make it easier to handle defeat.
Many successful athletes insist they learn more from defeat than they do from victory. Helping young athletes cope with defeat in a healthy way can benefit them throughout their lives.

Morgan City police radio logs for July 23-26

The following are the radio dispatch logs from the Morgan City Police Department. To report unlawful or suspicious activity, call the Police Department at 985-380-4605.
Friday, July 23
8:54 a.m. 800 block of Eighth Street; Alarm.
12:07 p.m. Marguerite Street; Complaint.
12:14 p.m. 1100 block of Marguerite Street; Animal.
12:37 p.m. 2300 block of La. 70; Medical.
12:46 p.m. 600 block of Kentucky Street; Suspicious person.
1:55 p.m. La. 70 and Veterans Boulevard; Hit and run.
2:40 p.m. 900 block of Federal Avenue; Phone harassment.
3:02 p.m. 3000 block of Catherine Street; Complaint.
3:09 p.m. 100 block of Eleventh Street; Disturbance.
3:46 p.m. Garber Street; Disturbance.
4:58 p.m. 7500 block of La. 182; Theft.
5:13 p.m. 1500 block of Federal Avenue; Frequent patrols.
7:40 p.m. 300 block of Mallard Street; Complaint.
7:40 p.m. 1500 block of Federal Avenue; Complaint.
8:26 p.m. 700 block of Fifth Street; Complaint.
8:34 p.m. 3200 block of Vine Drive; Medical.
8:35 p.m. 500 block of Freret Street; Medical.
10:34 p.m. 1100 block of Marguerite Street; Disturbance.
10:45 p.m. 1400 block of Maple Street; Suspicious subject.
10:47 p.m. 300 block of Egle Street; Complaint.
Saturday, July 24
12:47 a.m. 200 block of Chennault Street; Animal complaint.
1:19 a.m. 900 block of Kimberly Drive; Open door.
2:19 a.m. 300 block of Egle Street; Medical.
6:48 a.m. 400 block of Seventh Street ; Alarm.
8:10 a.m. 2600 block of Sixth Street; Suspicious vehicle.
8:36 a.m. 2600 block of Sixth Street; Complaint.
11:38 a.m. 1400 block of Sandra Street; Alarm.
12:08 p.m. 1500 North First Street; Civil.
1:03 p.m. 400 block of Garber Street; Complaint.
1:21 p.m. 100 block of Mallard Street; Civil.
1:41 p.m. 1000 block of Brashear Avenue; Welfare concern.
4:02 p.m. La. 70/La. 182 junction; Accident.
4:21 p.m. Marquis Manor area; Alarm.
4:29 p.m. 1200 block of David Drive; Stand by.
6:20 p.m. 3000 block of Roderick Street; Theft.
6:50 p.m. 100 block of Wren Street; Welfare concern.
6:52 p.m. La. 182; Reckless operation.
7:06 p.m. Sixth Street and Brashear Avenue; Sign and signal.
7:29 p.m. 1200 block of Victor II Boulevard; Disturbance.
7:36 p.m. 7200 block of La. 182; Medical.
8:29 p.m. 7400 block of La. 182; Loud music.
8:37 p.m. 1400 block of Second Street; Disturbance.
8:37 p.m. 400 block of Adams Street; Disturbance.
9:06 p.m. Duke and Sixth streets; Loud music.
9:10 p.m. 1500 block of Nevada Street; Disturbance.
9:14 p.m. Myrtle Street and La. 182; Reckless operation.
9:39 p.m. La. 70; Stalled vehicle.
9:45 p.m. 1000 block of La. 70; Reckless operation.
9:48 p.m. U.S. 90 West; Reckless operation.
10:15 p.m. 300 block of Wren Street; Disturbance.
10:48 p.m. 600 block of Bowman Street; Removal of subject.
10:58 p.m. 500 block of Roderick Street; Disturbance.
Sunday, July 25
1:05 a.m. Front Street; Suspicious vehicle.
1:57 a.m. 700 block of Fifth Street; Criminal damage to property.
7:38 a.m. 1400 block of North Street; Theft.
7:59 a.m. 200 block of Federal Avenue; Civil.
1:48 p.m. 1100 block of Marguerite Street; Traffic stop/disturbance.
4:54 p.m. Westbound before MC high rise; Stalled vehicle.
4:55 p.m. Martin Luther King Boulevard and Cherry Street area/Patterson; Warrant/arrest.
5:03 p.m. 1500 block of Bernice Street; Disturbance.
5:39 p.m. 100 block of St. Clair Street; Medical.
6:20 p.m. 2300 block of Cypress Street; Stand by.
9:55 p.m. 1000 block of Brashear Avenue; Alarm.
9:59 p.m. 600 block of Willow Street; Animal complaint.
10:03 p.m. 6200 block of La. 182; Crash.
10:42 p.m. 7100 block of Park Street; Animal complaint.
10:45 p.m. 200 block of Chennault Street; Animal complaint.
10:49 p.m. 400 block of Belanger Street; Complaint.
Monday, July 26
12:19 a.m. Sixth and South Everett streets; Disturbance.
1:10 a.m. 1400 block of Railroad Avenue; Criminal damage to property.
1:22 a.m. 1000 block of Greenwood Street; Alarm.
1:32 a.m. 200 block of Fourth Street; Alarm.
3:25 a.m. Sixth and Florence streets; Suspicious subject.
3:55 a.m. Fifth Street and Railroad Avenue; Open door.
4:06 a.m. Front Street; Suspicious vehicle.

Nicholls receives grant to research coastal features

Nicholls State University will receive $495,368 from the Restore Act Center of Excellence for Louisiana to help coastal scientists better understand coastal ridges.
Researchers will use the grant money to categorize the ecological attributes of the ridges to help coastal scientists design future ridge restoration and management projects.
The Coastal Protection and Restoration Authority selected the Water Institute of the Gulf as its center of excellence in 2015. In this role, the Water Institute administers competitive grants to assist research that reinforces the state’s Coastal Master Plan. Fines and penalties from the 2010 Deepwater Horizon oil spill distributed through the Restore Act provide the funding for the grants.
Nicholls’ proposal was one of eight projects, totaling $2.3 million, selected from 20 submissions, marking the first time university researchers have received Restore Act money.
“This funding is recognition of the strong reputation of Nicholls scientists and students and the important coastal work they’ve been conducting over the years,” said Dr. John Doucet, dean of the College of Science and Technology and director of coastal initiatives. “This grant award is a win for Nicholls and the Coastal Center, but it is also a win for the communities of the Terrebonne-Lafourche-Barataria region.”
Researchers will study ridges and similar man-made structures in the Barataria-Terrebonne estuary. They will note ecological factors such as physical features, plants, wildlife and carbon sequestration. The research will also describe the socioeconomic roles the ridges play in the Bayou Region.
“Our understanding of how ridges function and the ecological and sociological communities they support is limited,” said Dr. Jonathan Willis, assistant professor of biological sciences.
“By resolving targeted data gaps and providing conceptual models of ridge function, we can facilitate planning for coastal ridge restoration projects.”
Faculty, undergraduate and graduate students from an array of departments including biology, geomatics, English and history and geography will contribute to the research.
Together, they will conduct field surveys, drone imaging, lab analysis, historical reviews and community interviews.
The research will start this fall and continue through 2023.
“I am proud that Nicholls State University continues to contribute meaningfully to the management and restoration of the Louisiana Coast,” Willis said.
The mission of the RESTORE Act Center of Excellence for Louisiana (LA-COE) is to provide research directly relevant to the implementation of Louisiana’s Coastal Master Plan by administering a competitive grants program and providing the appropriate coordination and oversight support to ensure that success metrics are tracked and achieved.
The Water Institute of the Gulf is an independent, non-profit, applied research institution advancing science and developing integrated methods to solve complex environmental and societal challenges.

Second person dies after July 13 Verdunville fire

The woman critically injured in the July 13 fire that killed a 5-year-old in Verdunville has died.

Stephanie Joseph, 55, died Sunday, officials said.

The fire also claimed the life of 5-year-old Joshua Hamilton on July 13.

The boy's uncle, Derwin Hamilton, 49, was arrested soon after the fire on charges developed by the State Fire Marshal's Office: second-degree murder and attempted second-degree murder. The state fire investigators say they believe Hamilton started the fire intentionally at a mobile home on Prairie Road in Verdunville.

There was no immediate word on whether another murder charge would be added because of Joseph's death.

Conviction on a second-degree murder charge in Louisiana brings a mandatory sentence of life in prison without parole. Attempted second-degree murd carries a maximum sentence of 50 years.

Firefighters responded to the fire the night of July 13. They found the child and Joseph badly burned.

Joshua Hamilton was pronounced dead at a local hospital soon after arrival.

Derwin Hamilton was also found at the scene and later admitted to starting the fire after an argument with the woman now identified as Joseph.

Scores of local people gathered in front of the mobile home Thursday to remember the boy with songs and a balloon release. There were also prayers for Joseph's recovery.

Sewart, Stazione win local BBQ Bash honors

The 2020 Bayou BBQ Bash was a slimmed-down affair because of COVID restrictions. It was still sanctioned by the Barbecue Competitors Alliance, but it was open only to the chefs, not to the public.
But the 2020 Morgan City event was enough to lure Neil Johannsen into the world of competitive barbecuing. And he was back for the 2021 BBQ over the weekend and under the bridge in Morgan City.
The Sewart Supply team captured the top St. Mary Parish honors in this year’s BBQ Bash. Aaron Guidry of Prairieville was the Grand Champion and won the barbecue chicken competition along the way.
The Stazione team won the Corporate trophy. The Reserve Grand Champion is James Cruz of Arabie.
Johannsen, an LSU professor in exercise physiology, finished out of the money in this year’s BBQ Bash. But the result isn’t likely to dampen his desire for competition.
“Honestly, we just like to sit around and cook,” Johannsen said.
The 2020 chefs-only BBQ Bash was Johannsen’s first competition. Since then, he has cooked at barbecue events in Marksville, Lafayette and elsewhere. Along the way, he has acquired some equipment.
“It was the realization of how much we had to carry around,” Johannsen said. And at that first Morgan City event, “we sat here hot, sweaty and buggy and said we can’t do that again.”
So Johannsen outfitted a trailer with air conditioning and a design on one wall created by his wife, Susannah.
Now all he needs is to place in a competition.
“Every time we do it, we get closer and closer to the final [judging] table,” Johannsen said. “We’re hoping.”
Nearby, Barry Smith of Hammond cooks on a rig that has a Saints fleur-de-lis painted on the front.
Smith has been involved in competitive barbecuing for more than a decade. A former landlord who was involved with the Kansas City Barbecue Society, another sanctioning organization, got him involved.
Now he has a garage full of trophies. He finished third in the chicken category at this year’s BBQ Bash.
For all his experience cooking, his family isn’t eager to share in the product of his talent.
“My family doesn’t eat barbecue,” he said. “I’d bring home a box of spices and some chicken and try it five different ways. I’d make them try it all.”
Now his concentration is on pleasing the Barbeque Competitors Alliance judges and on the actual cooking more than on the spices.
A favorite saying around the barbecue grills is “low and slow,” meaning good barbecue should be grilled over low heat and for a long time.
At home, that might mean 225 to 250 degrees. But Smith said that’s too low for competition because it might leave a three-hour window for when the meat might be done. To be done in time for judging, that window has to be reduced to about an hour. So Smith cooks at 275 degrees.
“If you can’t cook it right and make it tender,” Smith said, “it doesn’t matter what else you do.”
Nearby, Brandon Hunt, a Franklin native now living in Lafayette, was relaxing with friends near the Rak’s Slow Rolling Smoke trailer. He’s partners in the competition with Ronnie Romero of Youngsville, owner of Rak’s BBQ Supply.
“We’ve been placing here and there,” Hunt said. “Everybody’s just trying to do better.”

RANDY VERRET

Randy Verret, 64, a native of Franklin and resident of Patterson, died Friday, July 23, 2021.
Visitation was Sunday, 5-8 p.m., at Ibert’s Mortuary in Patterson. Services were Monday at 9 a.m. at St. Joseph Catholic Church, with burial following in the church cemetery.
He is survived by his wife, Debra V. Verret; two sons, Matthew Verret and Jacob Verret; two grandchildren; his mother, Delores Verret; his sisters, Ramona Guillot, Tina Dugas and Valerie Crappell; and a host of other relatives.
He was preceded in death by a daughter and his father.
Ibert’s Mortuary is in charge of arrangements.

U.S. Rep. Higgins, wife, son have COVID-19

St. Mary’s representative in Congress has contracted COVID-19 for the second time, and this time the illness is “far more challenging.”
U.S. Rep. Clay Higgins, R-Lafayette, made the announcement on Facebook over the weekend.
Higgins said he, his wife Becca and his son all have COVID-19. Clay and Becca Higgins were COVID-positive once before, “early on, in January 2020, before the world really knew what it was.”
The most recent episode “has required all of my devoted energy,” Higgins said.
Higgins has not announced publicly whether he has been vaccinated. Media sources quote an interview with the Lake Charles American Press editorial board in which Higgins said he believed he had antibodies against COVID because of the first infection last year.
“We are all under excellent care, and our prognosis is positive,” Higgins said on Facebook about the recent case of COVID-19. “We are very healthy generally speaking, and our treatment of any health concern always encompasses western, eastern, and holistic variables.”
Higgins referred to COVID-19 as “the CCP biological attack weaponized virus. …” That’s an apparent reference to the Chinese Communist Party and recent reporting linking the first cases of COVID-19 to a government laboratory in Wuhan, China. The reporting has stopped short of saying that the virus was created or refined as a weapon.
Higgins thanked his constituents for their support.
“I love and respect you all,” he wrote. “I am honored and humbled to serve you in Congress.
“Our mission will continue. My family and I will recover fully. Your prayerful support is felt deep within my family and will never be forgotten.”

Around Town for July 26

Happy birthday Lauran Delco, love, Mom, Dad and siblings … Happy birthday Kenya Bogan from family, friends and Ira.

Heavy numbers: La. ranks among states with highest obesity rates

The obesity epidemic in the United States is a major health issue, and it’s getting worse. The current national adult obesity rate is 29.7%, but almost half of adults are projected to be obese, not just overweight, by 2030, according to Harvard researchers estimates published in December 2019 in the New England Journal of Medicine.
While the country as a whole is facing an obesity crisis, the problem is much more pronounced in some states.
Louisiana is the state with the third highest adult obesity rate in the U.S. About 36.3% of adult residents report a body mass index of 30 or greater. High obesity rates can detrimentally affect health.
About 21.4% of adults in Louisiana report being in poor or fair health, the fifth highest share in the U.S. Nationwide, 17.0% of adults report subpar health.
Obesity is a leading risk factor for Type 2 diabetes, and 13.0% of Louisiana residents over the age of 20 have diabetes, the sixth highest share of all states. The diabetes prevalence across the country among the same age group is 10.5%
There are a multitude of social and economic factors that predispose certain populations to higher obesity rates. People with lower incomes are less able to afford proper medical care and healthy lifestyles, which include eating a healthy diet and having easy access to gyms and other options for physical activity.
The median household income in Louisiana is $51,073 a year, the fourth lowest in the U.S. and $14,639 less than the median across the country of $65,712 a year.
Insufficient sleep, defined as sleeping less than seven hours per night on average, has been shown to be a contributing factor to obesity.
Sleep deprivation interferes with the two hormones that control appetite. Lack of sleep can lead to increased levels of ghrelin (increased appetite) and decreased levels of leptin (diminished feeling of fullness), possibly leading to weight gain.
About 38.0% of adults in Louisiana report not getting enough sleep, the 13th highest share in the U.S. and compared to 35.2% of U.S. adults.
Health experts have pointed to several lifestyle factors that are likely contributing to the excess weight problem among Americans, including a sedentary lifestyle. The physical inactivity rate in Louisiana is 28.0%, the sixth highest in the U.S. Nationwide, 22.7% of adults don’t exercise on a regular basis.
To identify the most obese states, 24/7 Wall St. reviewed health data from the 2021 County Health Rankings & Roadmaps, a Robert Wood Johnson Foundation and University of Wisconsin Population Health Institute joint program.
These are the most obese states in America

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ST. MARY NOW

Franklin Banner-Tribune
P.O. Box 566, Franklin, LA 70538
Phone: 337-828-3706
Fax: 337-828-2874

Morgan City Review
1014 Front Street, Morgan City, LA 70380
Phone: 985-384-8370
Fax: 985-384-4255