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DEAR ABBY: After 28 years of marriage, is it strange that I would like my wife to initiate sex? I would like to know that she is interested, not just me.
When I brought it up three weeks ago, her response again was, “We can whenever you want to,” which wasn’t true because I have been turned down before.
Any suggestions? She stays home all day and wants for nothing. Do you think she’s getting it somewhere else?
FRUSTRATED IN THE BEDROOM

DEAR FRUSTRATED: I hope your wife is intelligent enough to recognize a red flag when it’s waved in front of her. I have a strong hunch that she isn’t “getting it somewhere else.” It’s more likely she no longer has a strong sex drive at this point in her life, or she may never have.
Also, she may not know HOW to initiate and needs coaching. If you can’t teach her, enlist the aid of a sex therapist. (Your doctor may be able to refer you to one.) If you do, it may not only spice up but save your marriage.

DEAR ABBY: I live on the opposite coast from my family. During the pandemic, my youngest brother and his wife bought a new, very large house. He told me they had plenty of room and, the next time we come for a visit, they want us to stay with them. Well, that visit will be in November, but no invitation to stay has been extended.
Should I remind my brother about his invitation, or should we just book a hotel? My gut instinct is to book the hotel, but my brother is very sensitive to how the family treats him, and I don’t want to hurt his feelings.
What should I do?
BIG SIS IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR BIG SIS: Ask your brother if his offer still stands, since it has been some time since he extended his “generous invitation.” Listen carefully to his reaction.
If you sense that he may have forgotten or the situation has changed because of COVID, tell him it would not be a problem for you to book accommodations at a hotel if it’s more convenient. Doing this should not cause hurt feelings.

DEAR ABBY: My wife and I have been married 32 years. We are still in love and consider each other our best friend. We survived some rough patches and learned how to make things right.
I have one concern at this point in our journey. My wife constantly says, “I hate myself.” The more she says it out loud, the more I see the impact on her emotionally.
What can a partner do to help? I’m 100% supportive of all she does and totally attracted to her, yet I can’t see this being healthy. Please help and thanks.
DIRTY WORDS IN CONNECTICUT

DEAR DIRTY WORDS: The next time your wife tells you she hates herself, ask her why she is being so hard on herself and ask her to be specific about what it is she hates.
Explain that you love her exactly as she is and worry that what she’s doing isn’t emotionally healthy. (I agree, by the way.) If she persists after that, suggest she make an appointment with a licensed mental health professional to discuss it.
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Good advice for everyone — teens to seniors — is in “The Anger in All of Us and How to Deal With It.” To order, send your name and mailing address, plus check or money order for $8 to: Dear Abby, Anger Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447.

Mary Ann Smith Wolfe, 82, a resident and native of Houma La., passed away peacefully on Monday September 6, 2021 in Lawton, OK.
Visitation will be observed on Saturday, September 18, 2021 from 1 p.m. until funeral services at 2 p.m. at Jones Funeral Home 715 Sixth Street Morgan City, La. 70380. (All visitors are asked to adhere to the CDC-local regulations by wearing masks and practicing social distancing). Entombment will follow funeral services in the Mechanicville Emmanuel Cemetery.
Memories of Martha will forever remain in the hearts of her children, Sandra Washington, Margaret Martin, Karen Miller, Dedra Wolfe, Wilda Wolfe all of Houma, La., Troy Wolfe of Las Vegas, NV, Myrna Adams and Tanisha Deans both of Lawton, OK; thirty-three grandchildren, forty-eight great-grandchildren, two great-great-grandchildren and a host of nieces, nephews, other relatives and friends.
Martha was preceded in death by her parents, Edward and Geneva Johnson Smith; son, Vincent Wolfe Jr. and grandchildren, Dedra McKay and Joshua McKay.
Arrangements entrusted to Jones Funeral Home of Morgan City-Franklin-Jeanerette and Houma. Visit www.jones-funeral-home.com to send condolences to family.

Leroy Willis, Jr., 61, a resident of Lecompte, La. and native of Franklin, La., passed away peacefully on Wednesday September 8, 2021 at Christus St. Frances Cabrini Hospital in Alexandria, La.
Visitation will be observed on Saturday, September 18, 2021 at Greater St. Stephen Baptist Church, 305 6th Street Franklin, La. from 9 a.m. until funeral services at 11 a.m., with Pastor Deondre’ Johnson Sr., officiating. (All visitors are asked to adhere to the CDC-local regulations by wearing masks and practicing social distancing). Burial will follow funeral services in the Lutheran Benevolent Cemetery - Main Street in Franklin, La.
Memories of Leroy, Jr., will forever remain in the hearts of his wife, Diane B. Willis; daughters, Debbie Fisher and Rhonda (Diningo) Langford all of Lecompte, La.; one brother, Alfred Kinchen of Franklin, La.; step-brother, Allen Willis of Omaha, NE; sisters, Mary Lee Willis of Fort Worth, TX, Eve Kinchen of Lecompte, La., Sandy Willis of Franklin, La. and Lorraine Willis and Lois Smith both of Omaha, NE and a host of grandchildren, nieces, nephews, other relatives and friends.
Leroy, Jr. was preceded in death by his parents, Leroy Willis Sr. and Dorothy Mae Willis; raised by his aunt, Thelma Abraham; brothers, Foster Willis and David Willis; sisters, Patricia Willis and Alzina Willis and a nephew, Loveless Willis.
Arrangements entrusted to Jones Funeral Home of Morgan City-Franklin-Jeanerette and Houma. Visit www.jones-funeral-home.com to send condolences to family.

BERWICK — Berwick has a new town government budget and a new deal that could lead to a new 10-lot subdivision.
The Town Council on Tuesday approved a new consolidated budget for the fiscal year that begins Oct. 1, a little leaner but with no cuts in services or staffing levels.
It also agreed to enter an agreement with Berwick LLC that opens the door for the new subdivision on Pattie and Fairview.
Also Tuesday, the council approved plans for the Berwick High homecoming parade Sept. 30 and a Gospel music event on the riverfront Oct. 16; heard about Port of Morgan City operations; and praised town government employees and residents for pulling together in the aftermath of Hurricane Ida.
Budget
The 2021-22 budget that passed unanimously Tuesday anticipates revenue of about $5.7 million, roughly $40,000 more than this year. The council budgeted a $25,000 increase to about $2.7 million in the revenue expected from local taxes and franchise fees.
The budget calls for spending $58,000 less than in the current year for a total of about $4.2 million. After $1.3 million in intergovernmental transfers are backed out — mostly spending financed through grants — the town government will be left with a $132,000 surplus.
That surplus will raise the accumulated fund balance to about $3.6 million.
The council also amended the current year’s budget to account for revenue and spending that arose since the original budget passed.
The biggest item in the amendment is a little more than $1 million for street overlay and repairs financed through grants. The town government also anticipates spending $350,000 on the new roof at Town Hall and spent $150,000 on a new excavator and $125,000 for two police cruisers.
A new pumping station cost $175,000. And $200,000 was transferred to the general fund from a 1% sales tax.
Subdivision
The agreement approved Tuesday will result in construction of a pump and lift station for the sewer system that will serve the subdivision at Pattie and Fairview.
The station will be turned over to the town government along with ownership of the 35-foot-by-35-foot piece of land where the station will be constructed.
The council gave preliminary approval in August to plans for the residential development. Berwick LLC has plans for a 10-lot subdivision on about 17 acres. The Planning & Zoning Commission had recommended approval.
The project will require further approval from the town government, but the preliminary OK gives Berwick LLC what it needs to move ahead with more detailed engineering plans, Planning & Zoning Director Gary Beadle told the council in August.
Berwick LLC’s incorporation documents list Kyna N. Smith of the Hancock Whitney Bank legal department in New Orleans and Patrick Loupe as agents. Its managers are listed as Hancock Whitney, Joseph Exnicios and Steven Barnett, according to the Louisiana Secretary of State’s Office.
Hurricane Ida
Mayor Duval Arthur talked about the time leading to Ida’s Aug. 29 landfall, when town officials gathered in the council chambers to watch National Weather Service reports. Until late in the afternoon Aug. 28, predictions were for a landfall near Berwick, possibly to the west.
“They were beating us to death with that storm,” Arthur said. “They said it was coming directly to Morgan City and Berwick.”
Instead, Ida came ashore at Port Fourchon, causing catastrophic damage in its path but sparing most of Berwick anything more than a couple of days without power and interrupted phone service.
But that meant long hours of work for police officers, firefighters and public works employees.
Berwick police, for example, were stationed to handle the traffic generated by returning evacuees and people from the hardest hit areas coming west for food and gasoline.
The town also hosted a shelter at the Berwick Civic Center. Residents of the town brought food to the shelter, Police Chief David Leonard said,
“They’re still bringing food,” Leonard said.
The chief and council members thanked town employees for their work and citizens for cooperating and pitching in.
Events
Berwick High sophomores Cherish Lewis and Paulina Trejo and class adviser Kim Vasquez sought approval for the Berwick High homecoming parade at 6 p.m. Sept. 30.
The parade will start at the high school and move through Country Club Estates on its way back to the school.
The students also asked the town to take part in Paint the Town Gold activities as part of the homecoming week theme of “Go for the Gold.” Homecoming week will be Sept. 27-Oct. 2.
The council approved the parade.
Also, the council OK’d the use of the riverfront pavilion by organizers of the Gospel music event Oct. 16. It will feature performances by music programs at several local churches.
Port
Port of Morgan City Director Raymond “Mac” Wade told the council that three dredges are authorized for work at the same time in the port channel for the first time ever. A fourth is scheduled to join them.
The dredging is a step toward deepening the channel between the Gulf of Mexico and the port’s dock to its authorized depth of 20 feet and width of 400 feet. That would make the port accessible by large cargo vessels for the first time in six years.